The sun rose over the Big Brother Campaign Offices, however, the birds were not chirping, the flowers were dying and President Paulie was sobbing over the horrific poll numbers that are hitting his desk…. Paulie had been so confident that he was going to win that he didn’t see the Feminist Party gaining ground on him and silently taking away his supporters.
It all started on Wednesday, while the President was running his mouth, throwing around insults, lying, blaming others for his mistakes and being preoccupied with his dashing good looks, hair and taller boys…. He didn’t notice the Feminists had united and were in the process of turning his campaign upside down.
First the Feminist Party managed to evict the Presidents Secretary of Sex, she went out in a blaze of glory on live TV, President Paulie was a little pissed that his sexy piece had been sent to the jury house but hey somebody must want to fuck him, right?? Nope nobody wanted to take on the job of Secretary of Sex, so the poor Prez would have to sleep alone from now on….
The Presidential Campaign managed a quick jab, and knocked out a leading member of the Fem Party, when his VP Corey won the HOH….. Bridgette was a casualty of the slight upper hand that the VP and Prez had for a hot minute and off she went to jury…..
Then the Fem Party pulled off a mega win, and one of their newest members managed to become HOH, a win that would throw the Prez into a hissy fit of epic proportions. Victor was crowned the new HOH! Now the Prez thought that Vic was his boy…. He didn’t know that Vic and his Secretary of Defense, Paul and the Secretary of Showmances, James, had defected to the other side. So when the nominations were announced, the shit hit the fan!
The President and his VP were nominated for eviction, they had been blindsided by the Fem Party, who they were so sure they were going to take out one by one…. but no, the ladies (minus Nicole) and a few fabulous men had banded together to stop the Paulie Pushcart from steamrolling all the way to the end and win it all!
Paulie cried, he sobbed, he hugged his VP, claiming he if he won the Veto that he would fall on his sword for the campaign and use it on his VP, so that Corey may claim victory in mid September….. The VP said, no sir I can’t allow that, but the Prez was adamant…. He was going to be a man.
While the Prez and his VP consoled one another in the bathroom, Victor and Paul were clinking beer bottles together and drinking, laughing and having a good old time….. Paul actually took the Campaign mascot off for a minute (the duck ring) while they celebrated the coup that had just taken place. Once the beers were empty, the kiddy water wing was reattached and off they went back down stairs prepared for the debate that was about to take place…
Once the Prez wiped his tears up off the ground, off his shirt and off his face, he went on to his evening rally…. He stood in front of a disgusted group of non-supporters, blaming Michelle for causing all the chaos that had engulfed his campaign…. She snorted and laughed at him…… He demanded that Victor tell him his strategy…… Victor responded with “What happens if I don’t have a strategy?” The Prez continued his tirade and announced that the defectors who had committed treason against him stand up and be publicly shamed. He made no sense what so ever. He even claimed that he threw the HOH competition because he knew something like this was going to happen and he wanted to know that his gut wasn’t wrong…..
Then he continued his campaign of mocking and insulting the traitors to his boys (3 of which are not actually his boys) making promises to his crew that they were going to be in his wedding party, almost claiming that he would call his first born son Corey Paul James Victor Cauliflower…. It was a hot mess.
Then he had behind closed doors meeting with the leader of the Fem Party, Natalie, he claimed he was not the one that came up with the FT comments (even though it was him) He never apologized, he blamed and finger pointed, he threw the campaign bus at each of his boys and said it was basically a mistake that he was nominated…. All while trying hard to win her vote to stay and to continue his trek to the glowing blue stage and screaming fans where Julie Chen would crown him the winner….
After the meeting the Prez asked Nat to bring James to him in the Africa Room…. She disappeared for a few minutes then came back to inform him that James was asleep.. Natalie immediately ran back to the have not room where James wide awake and told him how full of shit Paulie was, they giggled and snuggled in the bumper car.
Sadly the Prez found James and ratted out everyone in the house and everyone he had ever met, complained about what had happened to him since birth…. How hard his life had been fighting off better looking, taller men with his fists and fighting words…. It just wasn’t fair, but it was OK because he knew James had just slipped and fallen for the Hot Latino girl, even though she was a typical Jersey girl, he understood that James wasn’t strong and all was forgiven and they could get the campaign back on track….
For the majority of the night, the VP just laid in bed, trying to figure out what he had done wrong, listened to Nicole whine and complain, and never really interacted with anyone, he knew he was the VP and the Prez had to fix this whole mess that Michelle had allegedly started…..
So today is Veto….. They are playing hard to win… ALL OF THEM!! Victor, Paulie, Corey, Nicole, James and Paul are playing, with Natalie hosting. It will be interesting to see who wins, if Nicole wins and pulls the VP down then the campaign is over, Paulie will be booted out of the house so fast he won’t have time to pack properly…. That is if he stays because he is claiming he is throwing in the towel on continuing his family tradition of winning money in Big Brother, he is threatening to leave the game and refuses to go to jury…. Such a sore loser, but it’s so fun to watch!!!
Hugs Glams xo